Jazeera, Part One: Wings of Ineptitude

I don’t understand how some businesses stay in business.

Prior to arriving to Kuwait, I had heard a lot about Jazeera Airways, the new discount-carrier for the Middle East (think Jet Blue, but Arab). Everyone raved about it – it was basically the new coming in airlines. I had been looking forward to trying it out, since I had heard so much about their service and phenomenal prices.

In their defense the prices ARE phenomenal. So phenomenal, in fact, that Other Favourite Twin Erica and I had found 6KD tickets to Shiraz, Iran. For the pair of tickets, including taxes, we were charged 67KD (roughly $230). That’s from Kuwait to an entirely different country. What a change from the U.S. where $230 would maybe get me a ticket from San Diego to Los Angeles.

There was a slight hiccup though. Erica ended up vacationing in Greece for two weeks, which meant that we would have even less time to get visas. And Erica is one of those damn Yanks, which means that the chance of her gaining entry to one of the Axis of Evils was about the same as me winning the World Series. So, there was a problem.

Then Erica got accepted to four Snobby Schools with Green Ivy on their Walls. There were three factors that were now in play: the whole temptation to be one of those snobby students, the cost of the visa, and the fact that she may not even GET the visa. So, the two of us decided to cancel the trip to Iran.

Which was no big deal because hey, I want to go to Jordan. Or Damscus. Or Dubai. I could use the 67KD credit to go to one of those places.

Or, so I thought.

On Sunday, I gave Jazeera a call. You know, just as a friendly, hey, I’m not going to Iran anymore, can I have my credit please?

Incompetent Person #1: You don’t get a refund.
Me: Not even the taxes? Okay, I guess. Well, I’m not going to Iran anymore, so I just want to cancel the ticket.
Incompetent Person #1: You don’t get a refund.
Me: Uh, I know. That’s fine. But I’m not going, so I still need to cancel.
Incompetent Person #1: Okay. But you don’t get your money back.
Me: I am WELL AWARE that I don’t get my money back, but in either case, I am NOT GOING TO IRAN anymore so CANCEL THE TICKET.
Incompetent Person #1: There is NO REFUND.
Me: I. KNOW. I don’t WANT THE MONEY, I just want to CANCEL THE TICKET.
Incompetent Person #1: Okay, fine.

Like, what? WHAT? I understand that you want to make sure I am aware that I don’t get money put back on my credit card, but I understand that. I get it. I’m just not going to Iran anymore!

So then, incredibly enough, we get disconnected. Or they hung up on me, I’m not sure which. I call back. This time, I want to know if I can use the money to go somewhere else because this is MY MONEY, right?

Not so much.


Incompetent Person #2: Sure, we can change the ticket to go somewhere else. Where do you want to go?
Me: Can’t I just change that later?
Incompetent Person #2: Sure. When do you want to go?
Me: Uh… no idea.
Incompetent Person #2: Okay, you can change it for you and Erica later.
Me: Wait. No. I want ALL the money, since I paid for both tickets on my credit cards.
Incompetent Person #2: Well, you can’t.
Me: Why.
Incompetent Person #2: Because the other ticket is in her name.
Me: SO WHAT?
Incompetent Person #2: So you can’t use both tickets.
Me: But… but I paid for the tickets. On my credit card. Which you can see right there on the page.
Incompetent Person #2: But the other ticket is in her name. So you can’t use it. It says so when you buy the ticket.Me: I am looking at the terms and conditions RIGHT NOW and NOWHERE DOES IT SAY THAT.
Incompetent Person #2: It says: “All fares paid are non refundable except as provided in 'General Conditions of Carriage'”

I think this is when I started screaming.

Me: I DO NOT want a refund. I just want ACCESS to MY MONEY. Because I paid for the tickets on my credit card.
Incompetent Person #2: But you don’t get the money.
Me: So what you’re telling me is, even though I purchased both tickets, there is NOTHING I can do to get access to both tickets even though Erica is LEAVING THE COUNTRY and will NEVER use Jazeera ever again?
Incompetent Person #2: Right.
Me: Okay, what if I change the other ticket into my name?
Incompetent Person #2: Oh, sure, we can do that.


It took 20 minutes for them to tell me that. Twenty. Minutes. As I got transferred to yet another person (Incompetent Person #3) to process all this, I got disconnected. Again.

That was it. It was about 12:30, I work close to the airport, so I decided to get in my car and go.

Where I stood in line for another half hour waiting for my turn to speak with the representative.

I finally got to the front, and told the lady my situation. She looked at me in surprise.

Only Competent Jazeera Employee: Oh, we’ll just put both tickets in your name!
Me: But I don’t want to use both tickets in my name to go to the same place.
Only Competent Jazeera Employee: So I’ll just split the ticket into two itineraries. (clicks the mouse) Done!

The thing I don’t understand about customer service (especially in this part of the world) is why everyone was telling me different things. Why does everyone not know the policies? And, on another level, why did it take two phone calls and a visit to the airport before my problem was solved? This wasn’t really a complex situation, and I highly doubt that Jazeera had never come across this problem before. When someone says, “I am no longer going on this vacation,” the response should be “Okay, well we can’t give you a refund, but you can use the amount to go somewhere else.” Or something along those lines. And if someone understands that they don’t get their money back, do not repeatedly tell them that they don’t get a refund. I get it. Please stop telling me the same thing over and over again and start giving me solutions.

Coming soon: Jazeera, Part Two: Wings of Ineffectiveness