Have You Any Wool?

New York Friend Jessica has weird things happen to her a lot. Whether it’s being accosted on a pedi-cab by a Jesus lover or getting to be a VIP doorwoman at a celebrity party, Jessica is fond of looking to the heavens, rolling her eyes and exclaiming loudly “How is this my life?”

I was always amused by these stranger-than-life stories, the ones that you couldn’t even made up if you tried. I never thought I would have those kinds of experiences until I myself moved to a big city. Then, I moved to Kuwait.

I’m not sure if it was the sudden change in climate or if it was the 11 hour time difference. All I know is, I was driving home from a friends house when a cop pulled me over because my “lights were too bright”. As he wrote me a ticket, I saw about five cars drive by with no lights on at 9:30 p.m., all going about 120 kph (75mph). I cursed at the heavens, and wondered how, exactly, this was my life.

The other day, I was coming back from lunch with some coworkers. I work in the middle of nowhere, practically the ghetto. Farm-land ghetto, not East-Compton style ghetto, mind you. As we drove back, we noticed an orange cab in front of us.

For those of you not familiar with the Kuwaiti cab system, the orange cabs are the worst in Kuwait. They’re practically falling apart and, well, they just look dirty. This cab was no exception. But there was one unusual thing about it. In the backseat of this cab was a sheep.

As in the animal.

Just the animal. And the driver.

A sheep.

Uno sheep.

One sheep.

The sheep was just hanging out in the backseat of the cab, as if it were a Golden Retriever hanging out in the backseat of a station wagon driven by a soccer mom. As we passed by, it blinked at us, completely unfazed.

After getting over the initial shock, we all started wondering how, exactly the sheep got back there. Was it just hanging out by the side of the road and suddenly thought, “Dude, I am so over this joint. I want to go somewhere fun. Dubai! Where’s a cab?” Did someone ask the cab driver to take the sheep somewhere as a favour? Why a CAB? Are there no pick-up trucks that could be borrowed? Is it the cab driver’s sheep? Is the sheep being taken to slaughter? If so, is it aware of its fate? Is it being dropped off at the airport to be put on a flight to Egypt where it will meet its new Egyptian husband?

Had we not been on our way back to work, I would have insisted that we follow the cab, so we could find out what the story was. I mean, a sheep. In the backseat of a cab.

How is this my life?